Little Cute Pole - 4

This was the fourth time I went with this girl. If you read the first accounts you'll see that I didn't come with her on those occasions, but on this visit she was the first girl I went to see. It was actually quite late, and to be honest I think I was feeling a bit crap because I had had a whole day with only 1 decent girl, the comley girl and she wasn't a total stunner, and so I didn't really want to see the same girl again. Personally I like a mix of new and old, but I was passing the enclosed area which I had done ealier that day and had met the little cute pole then. When I had met her earlier in the day I said I would be back. She was stood with a black girl at the other corner and we had had a little chat. I remember it well because after it happened it struck me how informal and familiar the chat was like we were old friends/lovers, and how in real life no opne ever talks to me, let alone cute girls.

So it was getting a bit late and i was doing the trudge, only half looking into the windows atc and the black girl jumps out. I had actually met her befor eand she had said that the little cute pole was busy but that she could see to me, and I said no. On this occasion she kind of relieved me because she didn't hit on me, instead she said, hey, you looking for little cute pole, and I sort of said yes, I was hesitent, but she ran off and knocked on her door and she poked her head around and I sort of felt obligued to go in. It was like the black girl had confirmed by her actions the closeness of little Cute Poles and my relationship.

I went into the room and she explained that she was just packing up. Her English isn't that great and so it was a yes or a no really, I wanted to explain that I was just passing, but anyway, I went with her. Again, she is great. Its strange, I have to remind yself of how greatful I am for the company of Ho's, especially when they are as great as this girl, and yet this cruel complacency and indifference can take over me when i'm in the Red Light District, like I have forgotten that i'm am at least going to spend everyday of the next 1-5 months alone, depending entirley on when I next visit the Red Light District. Whe I go with these girls i'm always trying to absorb as much as possible, and with this girl its easy becasuse sh has a mirror on her ceiling.

So we fucked. I guess, I cant quite remember how it happened as my memories of her are always vague and mixed with other times. This was the fourth time. However, what made it different was that she had been in the throws of preparing to go home and through that I got a sense of her in another dimension. I cant quite remember but i'm sure that she was half dressed in jeans etc and that she had to get undressed from all that again which I'm guessing that I found erotic. I always that when ho's are dressed normally I get more excited for some reason like it makes them more real, just another step towards the taste of the girlfriend I dont have.

I remember that she was faffing around with a sheet that had a stain on it. She said that she had just tried to wash the sheet under the tap, I assume just that small part, and I imagine that was what she had tried to do as it did look quite believable.

So after I came, and I really cant remember that or extract it from the other occasions, we talked. I probably dressed slowly, but she was dressing too. I asked if I could take a photo and she said no, again. I cant reember exactly what she wore, but I remember it being very chic, or very fashionable in a clean and very casual manner. She had a locker in her room that I had never noticed before that you lock with a padlock and it looked quite rickety and rough, just a chipboard affair. I'm guessing but I think she put stuff like her portable stereo in there and condoms and such. There appeared to be a total of 2-3 lockers I think and she gave me the impression that she was finishing at 10pm and maybe another girl was starting after that but as it was the middle of the week i'm not sure.

I wish I wcould remember what she wore but i'm sure she had jeans on, but fashionable jeans. Again, I remember being struck by how short she was and I probably said something to that effect as I always pick on the bleeding obvious. I half remember a belt, a large fashionable belt that went over a loose jumper or sweat top. I think she had on some fashionable sneakers, like plimsols, the canvas type. Again, everything she had was really small.

So what I remember from this was another dimension of the ho, the real world image. It seemed that she was happy for me to hang around for a bit while we dressed, but I think I picked up on when she was ready to go and that I should leave first so she could finish off, but probably more likely so that we didn't walk off together. This is the second or third time that I have seen a girl just before she was leaving, but never have i thought about hanging about. I think the last thing I really want to see is them get collected by their 'boyfriend' etc. However, when sat in the pubs on the main routes I have often seen hos scuttling about to and from work. You can easily spot them, they always look so clean and bright. They look so small against the real world, but you can tell that they are hos or at least in that industry. I love to see that. They are like little trains. A part of me wants to reach out through the glass window and stretch out across the canel to their diminishing figure and say hey, hows it going? can I come with you. Its like they are going to a special place of happyness, but that you can see it, like a sense of sasperilla, the imminent potential and the long goodbye. There they go. I've seen them getting picked up by thier fathers? Their boyfriends their friends. You can see them gaggling together down the street. Its all part of the package tour really in the Red Light District, always so well dressed against the elements, sensibly with big fur hoods and belts and buckles like something from a teens dream. This harsh reality, playing with the emotions and the stark reality of eternal solitude and unfilled dreams, because of course theres no girl for me.

So, I left her in the room and plodded off, I never look back. Its all just a dream anyway.